[Chatting] Boyfriend's unilateral divorce notice after frequent conflicts with mother-in-law...Will the lease be divided into 200 million won?

□ Broadcast date and time: October 21, 2024 (Monday)
□ Host: Attorney Cho In-seop

□ Starter: Attorney Cho Yoon-yong

* The text below may differ from the actual broadcast content, so please check the broadcast for more accurate information.

□ Reporter: My boyfriend and I met when we were in college and have been in a relationship for 10 years. They both made plans for their wedding as they settled down in a stable position at work. First, I got permission from both parents to marry me, and then I got to meet them... I have set a date for the wedding in ten months. Marriage, it's not normal. There was a lot to prepare. As a result, we often quarreled, especially when deciding on a newlywed house, marriage, and wedding venue. It was because my boyfriend's mother interfered too much. I couldn't stand it, so I told my boyfriend to stop my mother. But he avoided it, saying he listened carefully to adults. The wedding preparations creaked and flowed. We have finished making reservations for wedding halls and sudme, shooting studios, and making wedding invitations. I paid half for the wedding, and I also sent 200 million won, about half of the lease deposit for the newlyweds, with my parents' support. However, with the marriage just around the corner, I had another conflict with my boyfriend's mother. This time, it was a prediction problem. I met my mother and talked to her, and she wanted so much and was picky. I thought it would hurt my feelings if I talked more, so I avoided my seat for now. By the way, the next day, I heard something absurd from my boyfriend. It was a farewell notice. I told her I was rude to her and she said she couldn't get married. I immediately apologized to my boyfriend and mother, but the response was cold. My boyfriend's mother called my parents and accused me of breaking up the marriage. My parents and I were devastated by the unilateral break-up. First of all, I want to settle the cost of preparing for the wedding, but I can't reach my boyfriend. What should I do?

◇ Lawyer Cho In-seop (hereinafter referred to as Cho In-seop): < Attorney Cho In-seop's Counseling Office> It was the story of breaking up marriage at the end of preparations for marriage, in this case... It's common, right?

◇ Cho In-seop: Even when we broke up while preparing to get married... Can we protect our rights through domestic litigation procedures such as alimony and property division claims like in divorce?

◆ Lawyer Cho Yoon-yong (hereinafter referred to as Cho Yoon-yong): The story can be seen as being engaged and then terminating, but because being engaged does not necessarily mean that you have to get married, you cannot claim compulsory performance of engagement, but you can cancel it by mutual agreement or if there is a reason for termination of engagement. Our civil law sets legitimate reasons for the termination of engagement, including cases in which one party is sentenced to more than suspension of qualification after engagement, trial for commencement of adult guardianship, incurable psychosis, other incurable illnesses, engagement or marriage with another person after engagement, adultery with another person after engagement, and unknown life and death for more than a year. However, the reason does not correspond to the reason for the cancellation of the engagement under the civil law, but the other party unilaterally notified the divorce, that is, the intention to terminate the engagement. When the engagement is terminated, one party may claim mental or property damages against the negligent other party, and such claims for damages for termination of engagement are also stipulated as domestic litigation cases under the Domestic Litigation Act and will be handled under the exclusive jurisdiction of the Family Court. However, the claim for termination of engagement is a separate claim from divorce, and it is not possible to claim alimony or property division due to divorce, but to claim compensation for mental suffering caused by unfair destruction of the engagement, property damage, or restoration.

◇ Cho In-seop: Are there any special requirements when filing a claim for damages? What are the particular requirements for engagement or disengagement?

◆ Cho Yoon-yong: Engagement is a kind of reservation of marriage for the purpose of getting married. In general, engagements do not need to have a special format, such as having an engagement ceremony or having to leave a written contract, but they are considered to be established if there is an agreement between the parties who wish to enter into marriage in the future. If a lawsuit is filed for damages, it should be acknowledged that the engagement has been established due to an agreement between the parties to marry, but as in the case of the story, it is not unreasonable to admit that the engagement was established at the time of the meeting with the permission of both families. The cancellation of the engagement does not require a special format, such as a written one, but can be canceled according to the party's expression of intention. In the case of the story, it may be considered that the engagement was lifted when the other party indicated to the plaintiff that he could not get married.

◇ Jo In-seop: Can the other person's parents be a party to a claim for damages caused by the termination of engagement, other than the person who was about to get married?

◆ Cho Yoon-yong: First of all, the person who was unilaterally terminated from the engagement may claim compensation for mental and economic damages due to the termination of the engagement, but it may be questionable whether the parents of the person who suffered mental pain while watching their daughter's breakup can also claim compensation together as plaintiffs. There is room for debate about whether a parent who is not an engaged party is eligible to sue for damages, but in conclusion, there is a precedent in which the parents of the person who was terminated can also claim damages under the same procedure, and it is also possible for your parents to claim damages for their daughter's mental distress caused by the breakup. On the other hand, you may want to hold not only the person who notified you of the breakup, but also the mother of the other person responsible for the breakup, which is also possible for the mother as a co-defendant to claim damages for the breakup.

◇ Cho In-seop: When you look at the content of the story, what do you think would happen if you filed a claim for damages?

◆ Cho Yoon-yong: First of all, if you look at the possibility of recognizing mental damages, or alimony, the content of the story alone seems to have often argued over differences in the process of preparing for marriage, and it seems that conflicts accumulated with each other and eventually reached this result. I fully sympathize with you and your parents for the trauma and pain, but it will be difficult to determine that the underlying and primary responsibility for the cancellation of the engagement is solely on the other person, or that the other person's negligence is far greater than that of the other person, and it may be difficult to get alimony recognized. On the other hand, in relation to the expenses spent preparing for the wedding, if it is clear that the engagement is due to the other party's negligence or liability, you may also be eligible for property damages. However, even if the other party's negligence is not clear, the Supreme Court admits a claim for restoration of the engagement gift if the engagement is canceled, and in light of the principle of equity, the writer can be settled for the cost of marriage. However, it is difficult to get back sunk costs such as studio filming costs, wedding invitation production costs, and wedding hall reservation fees that have not been spent, and you will be able to get back from the other party for the 200 million won sent as a deposit for the newlyweds.

◇ Jo In-seop: Now, to summarize what we've done so far... In the case of termination of engagement, you can claim psychological and property damages for your boyfriend's unilateral dismissal notice. Engagement is established without a special form, and the cancellation of the engagement is also possible with the expression of the parties' intentions without a special form. It seems possible for your parents to claim damages for the cancellation of their engagement with your boyfriend and mother as co-defendants for mental distress. However, since it is difficult to say that your boyfriend is primarily responsible for the cancellation of the engagement, the possibility of recognizing alimony is small, and it seems possible to claim the restoration of the marriage preparation cost and return the 200 million won deposit. So far, I've been with lawyer Cho Yoon-yong.

◆ Cho Yoon-yong: Thank you.

◇ Cho In-seop: You can listen to <Attorney Cho In-seop's Counseling Office> again on YouTube. If you have any questions or suggestions, please comment.